Scared cripples, but Sacred invites

I don’t know about you, but I’m finding that keeping in step with the Spirit doesn’t come naturally for me, but must be formed supernaturally over and over and over again. There’s a circuitous motion to it…moving from flesh or natural ways, into the sacred dance with Jesus and a coming back again when we forget or lose our way. This pathway to 'more' is made by moving- one tiny step at a time.

I was thinking this week about the slight difference between the words sacred and scared—-and how just transposing two of the letters creates a monumental difference in their description and in turn how we live, in light of them.

It's in the book of Galatians, chapter 5, where the writer (the apostle Paul) speaks to this keeping in step with the Spirit, which I’m learning more and more to believe is really an invitation to the sacred life. 

Galatians 5:25 The Message

Since this is the kind of life we have chosen, the life of the Spirit, let us make sure that we do not just hold it as an idea in our heads or a sentiment in our hearts, but work out its implications in every detail of our lives.

This is a moment by moment, way of being, marked by Jesus ways, and his practices. Not simply doing the right thing, but staying close to the perfect One relationally, so that we can experience his life giving ways.

The second thing I noticed about these two words, along with the similarity of their spelling, is that although they look similar our experience of them is diametrically opposed to one another. 

Much like oil and vinegar.

When we transition from sacred to scared, we realize, sometimes not right away, that we have moved out of the wide open space where freedom is found, into a state of wide eyed frozenness or paralyzation. 

Fear has a way of doing that. It stops us in our tracks and makes our eyes lose their heavenly vision. Before you know it, not only has our cadence lost its divine rhythm, but our feet feel like they weigh a million pounds. You see, fear is not just a mind thing, it’s a body thing too. We cannot simply be afraid only in our heads——it infiltrates all of our being.

And one of the most obvious ways we can recognize its presence is when we realize we are believing that we will always be here. In other words believing the lie that things/life will never look any different than they do right now. Fear is mean and it often breeds hopelessness, which usually always feels dark and debilitating and leaves us with the sensation of feeling trapped.

But what if there’s a pathway out of this stagnant space? What if life is more about movement—-about choices and freedom, with an invitation for more?

Scared cripples  but Sacred invites!

For me, when I find myself in that scared spot, one of the things I notice is that I lose the ability to make decisions as freely as I normally can. If I pay attention, I’ll usually notice that somehow I’ve been hijacked by “what if’s”, in the negative sense of the phrase. Rather than them being sprinkled with expectancy and hope, my brain’s been taken hostage and the fruit of the Spirit that live in me have somehow lost their flavor. It’s as if the love, joy, peace, faithfulness, goodness, gentleness and self control have gone missing and instead I’m chalk-full of anxiety and irritability, usually with a generous side order of criticism. It’s as if all of the normal places where there’s room for growth and process become places where condemnation and should-have’s now find their home.

But what if the shift back to the gentle land is only a fraction of a movement away? What if the invitation to the spacious place is actually right there in the middle of what feels so harsh and confining. And what if I told you it’s really just a slight, but purposeful shift in how we are thinking or feeling and what we’ll do about it.

Sometimes I need the help of a friend, and other times it needs to be done alone, just me and Jesus. For me, this new way of being is often brought into being by BEING. Here’s what I mean….It’s about slowing myself down enough to pay attention to all of me and breathe. I will often sit down, close my eyes and take note of my whole body, from the bottom of my feet. How my shoes feel, up to the chair under me, all the way up to my chest and how tight or loose my breathing is. It’s only in this slowing down that I am able to take note of my whole being.  I usually do this process with my eyes closed, which always leads to taking some big deep breaths. Slowly filling my lungs with fresh, life giving oxygen.

Brennan Manning used to talk about how breathing in, “Abba” and exhaling, “I belong to you” was a simple way for him to remind himself that he wasn’t alone in his fear. This simple act of worship was life changing for him and has been super helpful for me too, as I’ve adopted it in my own life. It’s in this slowly turning our heart and mind to the only One who can do anything about our situation, that empowers us to see more clearly, so that we can be gentle enough with ourselves to hear what it is that we really need. To extend grace to ourselves right in the middle of the scared space…to wait for language that speaks a better word and creates room for us to be human. Men and women, made in the image of God, invited to lean into a new way of living that is marked by belonging. 

So my prayer for today is that we will be aware enough to notice when we’ve moved from the sacred space with God and others, into the scared place and take the necessary time to be gentle with ourselves and wise enough to grab the hand of Jesus so He can lead us out and into the spacious place with Him.